Coming Home!

 

18 DECEMBER 2010

Hello All;

We just arrived home today after a 52-hour trip back to the States and I haven't had Internet access for a while. We are not coming home with our son so we are disappointed but still hopeful. On Thursday Parliament postponed discussion of the foreign adoption moratorium until next week. Based on this and other factors, we will be coming back to the Ukraine in a few months.

We visited “S” continuously for 21 days while we were here and gave him a big Christmas gift before we left on Thursday. Saying goodbye to him left our hearts heavy.

Thanks for all your prayers and support.  Email me personally for more information.

CHRISTMAS IS COMING!

This is a picture of the Opera and Ballet Theater about 1 block away from our flat. Taken yesterday at 4:30 pm.

Nothing much has changed with our daily routine, so I haven't been blogging. We are anxiously awaiting the vote by Parliament on Thursday regarding the possible moratorium on adoptions which will help elucidate our path.

It's been snowing lately which has lengthened our daily trip to the orphanage to about 1 hour each way. It's amazing how gridlocked this country becomes with snow - all the trucks pull over and line up along on the side of the road, waiting for it to be either plowed or improve. We saw one jack-knifed truck which has been sitting off the road for 2 days now.   

We have been having GREAT visits with "S"! He's always happy to see us, doesn't really want to clean up when it's time to go but always runs back to his classroom with a smile on his face when we leave. We are getting more and more used to each other and there is no doubt we're bonding just fine! Scott found some great shoes and thick wool socks for him the other day. His current shoes are worn and always fee a bit damp inside and his socks had holes in them. We brought them today and he tried them on but did not want to wear the shoes. I've read about this with orphaned kids; they are used to wearing hand-me-down clothes so aren't used to stiff shoes, tags etc. When I bring clothes for our next trip, I need to remove all tags. Also some orphaned kids have "sensory integration disorder", meaning their brains take more time to process sensory information due to neglect. This is why when we finally get home, we cannot take him out, to say, Chucky Cheese right away.......let  alone somewhere like Disneyland! These kids just melt down because they can't process all the new sensory information coming in. They eventually build new neural pathways though. This is why we'll probably be keeping him around the house only for the first month or two.

We love Sundays at the orphanage! There is no school so we get to play with "S" and all of his friends -- it's crazy! We just adore being with all the screaming kids! Last Sunday we brought juice boxes, snacks and the movie "Jumanji" to play on the laptop. I tried to create a "movie day" for the kids, just like our movie nights at home. I tried finding microwave popcorn but it doesn't exist in any store here. Instead I brought chips, cookies, tangerines and bananas. The kids went nuts when I opened the chips....I watched as one little boy grabbed a handful and stashed it under a reclining chair to hide it from the others, then he would reach under and eat his treasure slowly. The kids all seem very happy and love their teachers (who supervise them on the weekends). They all ran off with our cameras/cell phones again and the first people they photographed were their teachers (2 nice young women in their 20's). All the kids constantly came up to us and ask if they could keep various toys we brought (some are very good with the "puppy eyes"). I had to say no to make it fair, but ended up giving each kid a crayon and 1 page from the Shrek coloring book. My little Roma girl was there too-  she wasn't really into watching the movie but instead grabbed my Russian/English flashcards and motioned me to teach her English. I was amazed at her initiative. She repeated each word after me with her cute accent. She's the one who also loves cats and begged to keep the cat doodle pad we played with last time. Unfortunately I couldn't do this - it just killed me to say no! I finally caved and snuck her 2 of my finger puppets she had been playing with (Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf). I indicated I wanted her to hide these since toys get taken away from the kids (understandably, since there is no way the small staff could keep track of individual possessions). We snuck into her dorm-style bedroom to her cabinet near her bed where the kids have their tooth brushes and one personal item (remember "S" 's stuffed animal he kicked around the room?). In her cabinet was a cute, red, little-girl purse with gold trim. I motioned to her we could hide the 2 puppets in there. She eagerly opened the snap and pulled out a bunch of carefully folded pieces of paper with writing on them, placed the puppets in the purse, then replaced the papers on top. I wonder what the papers said? She also took a Wet Wipe from me I had used on her hands, folded it up and wanted to keep it too! I said "No - garbage". It's so sad what these kids value. I pray she finds a home someday.

Ukrainians like to use a variety of diminutives for their kids. Those of you who know me well, know all the pet names I have for Gavin - my sister-in-law, Suzanne makes fun of me for this (huh Bryan & Sasha?). Well my behavior hasn't stopped. I first began calling "S", "my angel" (moy an-gil) , then "my sunshine". Then I read some other pet names somewhere and began using those (my rabbit, my little pigeon, my crumb). This got me some weird looks from "S" and laughs when I used them in front of the orphanage Asst. Director. I guess these 3 names are reserved only for spouses/boyfriends/girlfriends. OK, now I know!

Today we brought glow sticks to our play date with "S". They were a HUGE hit as he had never seen them before. We made a fort out of blankets and tables/chairs in the playroom and had a ball with the glow sticks. Scott spotted a mouse running across the floor, then up under the slip cover of a chair while we were playing. Everybody watched as I carefully tippy-toed across the room to the chair to lift off the slip-cover to see if I could reveal the mouse. "S" yelled out, "Mama is a cat!" in Russian. Scott & Gavin were very happy since they were immediately able to translate what he said (No......I did not find the mouse). Today we noticed "S" is calling me "Mom" now, copying Gavin, instead of calling me "Mama" as he did last week.  I get sick to my stomach each time I think that we may have to leave this cutie over here longer than we want to. We're still keeping the faith that everything works in our favor to get him home! 

We're slowly becoming less apparent as expats around here. I was pleased to be presented with a frequent buyer cards at our favorite bakery and grocery store (fridges are small here, so we go there all the time). Many of the locals we've gotten to know here are very kind, once you break through the stony exterior. Nobody makes eye contact or smiles on the street, even if you smile at them. I've also noticed Ukrainians are extremely well dressed people. Even in this snowy, icy weather, you'll still see most women wearing 2 inch spiked-heeled boots (no wonder they don't smile!). (Hi David, I stole this line from you! ). Once they find out we are from California, most of them ask if Arnold is still Governator. I then have to explain what being a "lame duck" is and Jerry Brown.

Gotta go! Tonight we are downloading some Christmas caroles on iTunes to play during dinner. We miss everyone back home!

FROM GAVIN TO HIS FRIENDS

Gavin knows some of his friends are reading our blog so he wanted me to relay some information.

We are all missing the Chrirstmas decorations going up back home. Here in Donetsk they are decorating too, but the lights are just now being put up. Here, they celebrate Eastern Orthodox Christmas on January 7.  They celebrate on this day since this is the first day the Wise Men arrived to give Jesus gifts (thank you Dr. Govers for educating me on this;-)). Here Santa (known as Grandfather Frost) wears a long, red robe and gives gifts with the help of his granddaughter, who wears a light blue dress with white trim. Here is a picture of them:

 

Christmas Eve is called ‘Sviaty Vechir’ (Holy Evening). Generous amounts of tasty foods are usualy prepared for dinner and there needs to be at least 12 different foods on the table. A traditional food is ‘Kutia’ --  prepared from cooked wheat and a special syrup containing diluted honey, grated poppy seeds, raisins and sometimes walnuts (I'm definitely getting the recipe for this one!).

They are erecting a huge Christmas tree in the town square here. They've been working on it daily for 1 week, sticking real limbs into a metal base that's about  40 feet tall. We hope it's done soon so we can go take a picture next to it.

The similarities to back home is that EVERYTHING is on sale! The stores are trying their best to get in the black this year here as well! The big toy store we found where we buy "S" most of his toys is getting more and more packed and had a 25% off sale yesterday.

Another thing Gavin wanted me to say is he will be making a list of soccer terms in Russian so all the kids on our block(s) will understand little "S" when he gets home and can play soccer with him. Here's an example:

Ball = Myech
Goal = Gol
Pass to me =    Mney!
Corner Kick = Kor-nir
Shot/Hit/Kick = U-dar

We miss all of you back home!

Jingle All The Way,
Gavin, Dani & Scott

STILL HAVING FUN WITH "S"

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY, 6-8 DECEMBER 2010



This is the toilet in the orphanage and also represents most public toilets you'll come across here. No toilet paper, soap or hot water. For families coming after us don't forget lots of small packs of disposable Wet Ones and Kleenexes!

I'm not blogging a lot these days since our routine has remained much the same as we wait for word from our interpreter/contact. He works on our case here with the beauracrats, to get things moving, then goes back to Kyiv to work on other cases while we're waiting for things to happen. He returns about once a week for 1-2 days. Things move VERY SLOW here. We're mostly on our own but we don't mind! We visit "S" daily and with each visit we are getting closer. We love this kid more and more and he gives us harder hugs each time before we leave. Today he gave us 2 hugs a piece! We can also tell he has a good sense of humor. We get a great work out each morning since he never wants to stop playing soccer. Today we also had a tickle fight then everybody decided to dog pile on me! He's still eating like a monster - today we brought a special treat..a cherry pie from McDonalds. It was gone within 5 seconds along with the 2 tangerines, a cup of yogurt, a juice box and some potato chips (bacon flavor are the most popular here..hey don't knock em until you've tried em!). I also found a hacky sack yesterday at a tiny store I discovered just by chance. This kid's an expert dribbler but had never seen a hacky sack before. Had to show him how to use it. We also taught him "Duck, Duck Goose" today. Since I didn't know the word for Goose, it became "Duck, Duck, Parrot". He picked up on it immediately then wouldn't stop playing. We also played Freeze Tag which I think he has played before. He's fascinated by anything electronic and begged and begged me for the small calculator I carry in my purse. I had to say no but told him we'd buy one and bring it to him tomorrow.

Even though he sure plays dirty soccer, we also have to remember how fragile he is. Today he crashed into a chair at the orphanage when we were playing soccer. I knew he was hurt since he was holding his head and not moving but did not cry. I tried to comfort him but he waved me away. When we FINALLY get home with this guy, you'll notice me making a big deal over every single scraped knee, twisted ankle or bruise he receives - it's part of bonding with him and showing him how much we care and that we'll always be there for him. Many kids in orphanages don't cry when they need something...since crying doesn't get them anywhere due to the high ratio of kids to caregivers. They have learned not to cry. So we have to TEACH him that we care about him and will protect him.

GOOD WEEKEND!

SAT & SUN, 4 & 5 DECEMBER, 2010

This weekend we visited “S” both days. Weekends are much different than the regimented weekdays we’ve observed at the orphanage.  Upon checking in at the office, we were told to head up to his room on the3rd  floor of one of the buildings. We entered his half of the floor and were met with 12-15 smiling faces! Many kids were taking showers and running in and out of the bathrooms with wet hair. “S” finished his shower and came running into the room where we were waiting for him and gave us all a big hug! His hair was still wet – all the boys here have the same very short buzz cut (I’m hoping they let “S” ‘s hair grow out a bit since he’s going to be adopted). I felt his feet and his socks were wet and cold. I took off my socks (my favorite Golden Retriever socks, mind you) and put them on his feet then rubbed them until they were warm. We also brought him a new warm jacket. The zipper doesn’t work on his current jacket and when we go outside and he holds our hands, his jacket flies open, letting in the bitter cold wind. He seemed pleased with the jacket but more excited about the other things we brought; a new plastic ball to play soccer, our portable DVD player with a kids’ movie, a “Wax Tap” calendar (the local soccer team from Donetsk), a Shrek coloring book and some foam airplanes. We went through the Wax Tap calendar and looked at the players month by month, as I explained this would go up in his new room in America. As he began playing with the toys, a few of the other kids hesitantly milled around the open door to the playroom. I motioned them to come on in and play and they did. They loved all the toys and quickly dove into the big black sack I carried everything in.  “S” was so generous, sharing candy with all his friends and showing them all the toys. The big hit of the day was the camera and our cell phones. First “S” grabbed our Canon and went around taking pictures of all his friends, then he showed them Scott’s cell phone and how it takes pictures. Everyone wanted in on this  so one by one we let each child take a picture with the phone.

There were only 3 girls on “S” ‘s floor that we saw. Overall, there are fewer girls up for adoption in Ukraine than boys. One of the girls had beautiful red hair (which is prized in Russian/Ukraine) and the other girl looked to be of “Roma” origin (Romania, Bulgaria, etc). I’ve read that kids of “Roma” origin sometimes are not given as much attention at orphanages than other children since they are thought to be of “gypsy” origin.  I was drawn to this darker girl. She seemed shy yet kept peering into the playroom where we were, from behind the door. I tried offering her a candy but she said no. Finally, with some coaxing, she acquiesced and said “spa-si-ba”. I motioned her to come play but again she said no. So I picked up an extra coloring book we had and a few crayons and went into the room she was in. She was elated about coloring and chose to color a unicorn. I then brought in 2 kids’ doodle pads, one of how to draw cats and one of a dogs. She chose the cat one so I tore out a few pages of the instructions and gave her some blank sketch paper for her to keep, along with the coloring book and crayons. Her face lit up! She was able to follow the steps for drawing the cat perfectly and stayed exactly in the lines with the coloring book. As we were leaving, she was the only kid who was on the ground with me cleaning up. What a sweetie - I want to take her home too!

We are trying to cut down on all the candy we bring to the orphanage so this weekend we decided to bring grapes, bananas and tangerines. I cannot get over how much “S” eats! He immediately wolfed down a huge banana then half of the one I was eating, a tangerine followed by about 20 grapes. He loves Scott’s fiber bars and rifles through our backpack for them immediately upon arrival. He still hordes all the candy we give him in his pockets.

We now know why “S” stated earlier he was scared of Gavin’s size. Scott witnessed one of the bigger boys pummeling one of the smaller boys in the head to get him to give up a balloon. The smaller kid quickly gave it to him, then they went back to playing together. Aside from this incident, I’m amazed with the manners, positive attitude and aptitudes these kids have! I have not seen any children with any of the physical signs of fetal alcohol syndrome I read so much about here.  This is one of the better orphanages in that all kids (who are older than 7) go to school on the premises and the people who run this particular orphanage seem to be extremely dedicated to these children. During the weekdays, it’s so quiet here….…all the kids are in class and it’s hard to believe there are at least 100 kids here since we hear and see nothing as we walk from building to building to take “S” to and from the playroom.  When we do see kids, it’s in the lobby of the office building, if they are going to and from class or lunch. They always are smiling and say “Ciao” to us. When I’ve offered them a piece of candy, I always hear “spa-si-ba!” (Thank you!). I’m sure they are thinking, “Why “S” and why not me?” I hope they understand it is nothing against them. It’s just fate we were presented with “S” and that he is a perfect fit for our family! I hope a time will come for each of them when they can have a mama and papa of their own.

If any of you reading this are considering adopting, David Avilla, our facilitator, is highly recommended. Even if you are NOT considering adopting or are not sure, David’s main business is running a hosting program over the summer for Ukrainian orphans. He always needs host families. The kids come to the Bay Area for 2-3 weeks and attend a “summer camp” type program during the day.  Check out his website on my right sidebar.

Tonight we went out to our favorite Ukrainian restaurant (called “Three Fat Guys”) and saw “Chronicles of Narnia”, as part of our Russian language immersion program ;-). It was fun but we always comment how much MORE fun it would be with little “S”.



 

GLIMMER OF HOPE

FRIDAY, 3 DECEMBER, 2010.

Today we've overcome some obstacles but more still loom on the horizon. We're not at liberty to discuss the details at this point. Our return date is now most likely Dec. 17-18.

Today was our best bonding day ever with "S".  He spontaneously began using the English word "pass" (as in "pass the ball to me") in our game of soccer in the playroom. Today he drew, painted and read a few pages out of his Ukrainian school book to us today. Although he speaks Russian, he reads Ukrainian. From my perspective, he reads very fast for a 7 year old. Our interpreter confirmed he reads very well also.
Thankfully my friend Val got me some Ukrainian tapes (thanks Val!) so I am a bit familiar with the language and could understand some of what he was saying. We've all been learning Russian, since that is the language that is most widely understood here. But the closer you go to the west side of the country (away from the border with Russia) Ukrainian predominates and some people don't appreciate you speaking Russian at all! An article in a local paper I was reading today, was about how Ukraine is starting a movement to have Ukrainian be accepted as the national language versus Russian (many still despise the years of Soviet occupation).

It seemed like "S" really opened up to us today. We're all getting more comfortable with each other. Maybe a weight had been lifted from his shoulders since he made the decision to go with us.

SNOW DAY, SAD DAY

THURSDAY, 2 DECEMBER, 2010.

Gav, looking out our kitchen window at the snow.

It snowed today in Donetsk. We learned of some major setbacks today also. Our hearts are still warm for "S" though, and we all keep his well being in the forefront of our minds. Bringing him home is our objective. We will not give up.

Today, I'm reminded of an old Ukrainian proverb which states, "Things will get better......somehow."
Hope this is true.

MAJOR PROGRESS!

WEDNESDAY,  1 DECEMBER, 2010

Evidently things went OK yesterday afternoon for Dmytro’s second visit. This morning we were picked up and taken to the Inspector’s office (the person who handles the paperwork on the orphanage side). We picked up the Inspector in our car and all of drove to the orphanage. We were seated in the Asst. Director’s office. “S” entered wearing the same oversized black suit, especially for us. He had been crying but stopped upon entering the room. We offered him a Kleenex. After blowing his nose, one of the caregivers came in and sat “S” on her lap. She was very animated and spoke to “S” in fast Russian, translating some of what she was saying for us. She said he has a best friend, Nichols, at the orphanage, he likes to write and draw, he LOVES football (soccer) – we nodded our heads approvingly- and especially loves a certain player named Andryis. I chimed in, “Andryis Shevchenko?”  “Da, da!” was the emphatic reply from those in the room. I had been reading about this Ukrainian soccer superstar in a local Ukraine/English magazine I purchased last week. He’s the captain of the Ukraine soccer team and a studly player who hopes to lead the team to a win in 2012 when Ukraine sponsors EURO 2012, the Super bowl of European Soccer, in preparation for the World Cup (he’s also very cute which is why I spent so much time on the article ;-). 

 The irony of this is yesterday, we were out for dinner, discussing what American name to give little “S” (his real name would be too hard to pronounce back home). I suggested many names which Gavin and Scott quickly dissed. When I said “Andy” and told them about the cute soccer superstar I read about, we instantly all agreed to this name! What a coincidence that little “S” actually worships this guy! Anyway, the caretaker’s questioning continued as she slowly worked in questions about living in the US and if he would like it – would he like to have pets? (he LOVES parrots! Thank God for Chucky). Would he like to have a mama, papa and brother?  Slowly I think “S” was coming around.  He did mention that Gavin was BIG and that he was scared of him (although we never saw any evidence of this when we were playing. In fact, little “S” liked to throw the ball at Gavin’s legs as hard as he could – Gavin did nothing but laugh. Gavin’s also been very good about showing him how to use the I-Pod and praising him when he pushed the right button). Scott and I think this fear may come from him being bullied by bigger kids in the orphanage. I had Dmytro translate to him, “Gavin will never hurt you at all! He will never be mean to you. He will ONLY protect you.” He seemed to understand and acknowledge this. He then must have agreed to be adopted by us since they walked him over to the other side of the desk and showed him a piece of paper with some writing on it. He was asked to copy the statement written on the paper. He wrote the statement carefully in beautiful Ukrainian handwriting (even though he speaks Russian) then signed it. We then all went off to the playroom for some fun time! As we were walking to the playroom, a group of darling, smiling boys, all dressed up for school, said hi to us in English. One boy stopped,  grabbed  “S ‘ s ” arm,  whispered something in his ear and looked at us. I would have paid good money to know what he said! Maybe “S” WAS now a source of black market Skittles and M& Ms.....   

We played for only 30 minutes since we needed to return to Donetsk to have some documents notarized. We had the afternoon off again so we hit the local McDonalds and fed some pigeons our leftover fries. Today wasn’t  the day to be outside since it was 18 F, so we went back to our apt. and relaxed. We were all happy about the outcome of our day.

There is one more hurdle to cross in this journey, which Dmytro is working on this afternoon.  “S” has a sister who is 16 years old in another orphanage. She’s in a school where she’s learning a trade and I believe will be emancipated next year. We’re not being given too much information on her relationship with “S”, but we DO know that “S” does not even know her name. Still, she needs to give her consent to this adoption also.  Details are still sketchy so stay tuned.

N.B.,

At 7:30 tonight we received a phone call from Dmytro. He has received verbal approval from the sister!  He said she was crying on the phone but DID agree to allow “S” to be adopted. I wish there was more we could do for her.  Who knows……she may have helped raise “S”. We’re just not set up to adopt at 16-year-old too. I will put my thinking cap on; there’s got to be something we can do to help her as well. 

ONE STEP FORWARD, TWO STEPS BACK

TUESDAY,   30 NOVEMBER, 2010

Today our daily routine remained mostly the same; Get up around 7 am, have breakfast. Our driver picks us up around 8 and we head out to the orphanage to see “S” from 9-11 am. Get back in the car to be driven back to Donetsk by noon were we usually wander around and find a place to eat lunch out. Then go shopping for toys for “S” or walk around until 3:30 PM when the sun sets and it gets cold. We go in and Scott watches soccer on Ukrainian TV while sampling yet another Ukrainian beer, I blog, work on my Russian Rosetta Stone lessons or read, Gavin does his homework or plays video games. It’s a bummer we can’t Skype you guys in the evenings (our 8 PM is your 6 AM). Sometimes I cook but last night we got take-out from a great Ukrainian deli we discovered. Gavin had a “mystery breaded thing” that turned out to be a delicious type of Perogi (mashed potatoes and meat, breaded and fried). I had a beet salad and Scott ate a pork chop. Sometimes we’ll watch one of the videos we brought then go to bed (we’re getting TONS of sleep here since we don’t have all the projects/responsibilities, etc. we would have at home). We’re all asleep by 9 or 10.

The good news about today was that Dmytro was back from Kyiv to help us by translating at the orphanage and getting things moving with the paperwork. The bad news was that little “S” was a bit apprehensive when they asked him if he wanted to be adopted. One of the things we need, is “S” ‘s written and verbal agreement to be adopted by us.  When we first arrive at the orphanage, we usually meet with “S” in the Asst. Director’s office then go off to play for a few hours in a play room. We’ve been having terrific times with him and it’s all fun, smiles and laughter in the play room! This morning we sat in the Asst. Dir.’s office and “S” entered, wearing a black suit over his flannel shirt and pressed black dress slacks. He looked so impressive! He also had on an oversized parka that didn’t zip up in front, which made him look smaller than he already is.  He sat down next to me and we all exchanged “hellos”.  Dmytro then asked “S” pointedly if he’d like to go with us to America. ”S” sat silently.  I tried comforting him by rubbing his back intermittently (not sure if this comforts or bothers him since he doesn’t respond. He’s not cuddly, which is very common among kids in orphanages who have experienced neglect early in life). He didn’t answer Dmytro’s question right off. Instead he stared down at his hands. He held his black knit cap in his hands and nervously folded it over and over again into a perfect accordion pleat. “S,” gently stated Dmytro again. “Do you want to go to America with Dani, Scott and Gavin? You can have a mama, papa and brother,” said Dmytro in Russian. “But I already have a mama,” came a small voice from somewhere inside the layers of the jacket.  “S" ’ s bio mother had come and visited him once at the previous orphanage he was in. Since then there’s been no contact. “But you understand that your mama abandoned you,” said Dmytro softy. “Da.” (Yes) answered “S”, as he kept nervously folding his cap and not making eye contact. “S,” Dmytro said to try and get his attention again, “Why don’t you want to go with Dani and Scott and be part of a family?” After a few moments of silence, “S” said quietly, “I don’t know.”

I tried to imagine the weight of this decision on those small shoulders. This kid’s been shuffled around, he’s confused because he finally feels at home at this orphanage. He had friends here and the caretakers are some of the warmest people I’ve met, (anywhere).  He gets time to play, goes to school on the premises, has a warm bed at night……this is a good reality for him. Also, I think anyone would want to be back with their mama, regardless of how bad the situation was. Did he really understand what was going on back at age 5 when he was separated from his Mom? What a heavy decision to make at age 7. I wish there was some way for me to assuage his pain and fear but there was not. This child would need to learn to love slowly. He wasn’t even able to respond to my touch at this point.

One thing I observed during this tough interchange was his emotional intelligence. He acted a bit embarrassed to say "no" in front of us. It showed empathy. I took this as a positive sign. Furthermore, I think any child who would say yes right away and jump into our arms may only be bonding superficially and may never succeed in bonding fully.  Of course I was nervous now, but tried to maintain a positive, objective perspective.

Dmytro decided not to press on with the questions. He decided to come back later this afternoon, talk with “S” again as well as some of his favorite caregivers, to see if they could help explain to him what was going on and help him understand this WAS a good decision. He may also confide some of his fears to the caregivers, so we may learn more about his apprehension.  I decided to leave the little picture album of our home (with captions in Russian and English) with “S” so the caregivers could have an idea of who we are and read it to “S”.  I wrote his name in Russian on the front cover and handed it to him.

 As far as the people we’ve talked to are concerned, there is NO future here for this child. The Ukraine is a poor country (average annual salary is $2,700 US dollars). There is a HUGE disparity between the rich and poor.  The people are very hard working but the country is still on rocky political footing and becoming a member of the EU is not an option yet.  We were torn by knowing that taking him away is the right thing to do..…but would he agree? 

We all left the office and little “S” lead us up to one of the play rooms in another building, for our 2 hour play period.  We had another great time drawing (he draws cats VERY well), doing more dot-to-dots and playing soccer with some makeshift goals. “S” called Scott papa and me mama today during our play time. He continued to shove entire KitKat bars, along with other goodies, into the breast pocket of his oversized suit when we offered him candy. We wondered what he’d be trading these for later on the “black market” of the orphanage!  The Asst. Director joined us for about  an hour. She sat in the corner with a big smile and talked to “S” while we played, prodding him along and explaining how fun it would be to play with us every day. I brought a book with me, “Welcome Home Forever Child” which shows a family of cats who adopt a cat-child. They show the parent cats kissing the boy cat’s knee when he falls down and blowing out candles on his birthday cake. The Asst. Director quickly joined me on the floor and began interpreting the book to him. When we left he was all smiles and gave me the biggest hug of all! We love this kid!